inmarine77 Posted December 18, 2008 Share Posted December 18, 2008 OK, I want to here from the dads and from the sons on this. For the dad, I would think that it would put more pressure on you and your son if you are the head coach of a team that your son is on, do you feel this is true/ For the sons, do you think it was added pressure for your dad to coach you, and if so do you believe that having someone else work with you on a daily basis would make it an easier situation? My dad coached me in baseball when I was younger, and I did not have a problem with it. Wrestling though is a whole new animal, so I was just wondering what everyone thought, thanx. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Regionrat1 Posted December 18, 2008 Share Posted December 18, 2008 can't be da coach at home ! Wraslin is one tough animal to balance Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MatChick76 Posted December 19, 2008 Share Posted December 19, 2008 I have a few friends who coach/have coached their sons. What I seem to hear from them is that it's OK until about 6th grade, and then after that it gets really tricky. I'd love to hear what some of the coach dads have to say about this topic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Cook Posted December 19, 2008 Share Posted December 19, 2008 The rat is correct. Never a coach at home. I have coached for 22 years and the last 4 my son is on the team. We have never had a problem. I do expect more from him. I do not have to push him. I have seen coaches in the past go overboard with their kids. I have also seen fathers yelling at their 5 yearold for a loss. The worst is the father trying to make his son something he never was. Work them hard but, keep it fun along the way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CE Fisher Posted December 19, 2008 Share Posted December 19, 2008 My son is 5 now. He wrestles on our elem. team. I coach the 4, 5 and 6 year olds on our team. I find that he is not as motivated to practice when I am there, but he practices pretty good when I can't be there for whatever reason. I think it is difficult for him to understand that I have 16 or 17 other kids that need my attention also. It seems he is always trying to get my attention away from the other kids. He is doing better this year than he did last year, but it still happens. The hardest thing for me is balancing the coaching with the parenting. I have to know when to coach him after a loss and when to shut it off and console him as a parent. I get more frustrated with him since he is my son than I do with the other kids, but I am learning to treat him the same as everyone else when we are on the mat. It is a learning process for us both. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trinedad Posted December 19, 2008 Share Posted December 19, 2008 The hardest thing for me is balancing the coaching with the parenting. I have to know when to coach him after a loss and when to shut it off and console him as a parent. I get more frustrated with him since he is my son than I do with the other kids, but I am learning to treat him the same as everyone else when we are on the mat. It is a learning process for us both. Something that worked for us when my son was that age, and still to this day, if you can accomplish it since you are coaching so many other kids. I was a parent for 1/2 hour after a tough loss, or a good win. After that, both he and I had time to settle down and put a little perspective on the situation. Then you can be a coach to him. Like I said, my situation was different, as everyones is, but it is an idea for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CE Fisher Posted December 19, 2008 Share Posted December 19, 2008 Thanks for the suggestion. I will give it a try. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TCWrestling Posted December 20, 2008 Share Posted December 20, 2008 My dad has coached me in wrestling ever since i can remember. He is always been there to support me as a coach and a father. He did expect more at of me than the other wrestlers on the team, but he never singled me out or treated me different. if i messed up he yelled at me, and if i did something good, he would congratulate me, although not to much. he did a very good job of keeping me level headed. i remember my junior year i beat Dedrick Harrison from Cathedral at the spartan classic and it was a huge win for me, i had lost multple times to him before, and after the match was over, dad told me i did a good job and as soon as i got home we were analyzing all of my matches, what i did wrong and what i needed to work on. we celebrated wins for a short period of time before it was back to the drawing boards to figure out how to beat the next opponite. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TandTdad Posted December 20, 2008 Share Posted December 20, 2008 I have a 9 and 11 year old who I've coached for the last 3 years. I've found that it takes a lot of patience and control when it comes to coaching them. I'm a little "over the top" at times. Sometimes I just can't understand why they don't go 100% all the time when wrestling in tournaments :-[ Could it be that their just kids learning the sport and doing their best? Lol, that's when I knew it was time for me to let go and let them enjoy the great sport that it is. By no means do I think they should win every match. I just want them to work their hardest in the match....win or lose. I've gotten a lot better and have even sat back and let others coach them. Boy, that's hard to do. But, I think it's best for them. I don't want them to hate the sport because of dear old dad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mdupnorth3 Posted December 20, 2008 Share Posted December 20, 2008 In high school I had my father as a coach in football and wrestling. I also had him as a teacher sophomore year. That was one tough year. We rarely discussed practice or the "game" at home. He kicked my butt along with everyone else on the practice field. Years later, he confessed that he was harder on me because he didn't want to be accused of favortism. I didn't notice it on the field. I did notice it when it came to class work and worked harder in that class than some of the others courses . He was always pushing me to study harder whether I was at school or at home. I remember him telling me the night before I went into the service that I would have no problem in boot camp because the toughness and discipline he had instilled in me would make the next few years seem like a walk in the park. He was right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nomercy145 Posted December 20, 2008 Share Posted December 20, 2008 my dad has coached me since i was 5 years old and i wouldn't have it any other way because he knows when to coach and when to parent and he knows when I'm not giving it my all and he gets on me for it. He does expect more out of me because i have been wrestling longer than anyone else on our team. But i like him being there Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weeblewobble Posted December 21, 2008 Share Posted December 21, 2008 There is also the point of coaching a pee wee vs coaching even a cadet. Not just the difference in the kids, but what moves the kids are capable of. A kids wrestling ability might be greater than a parents coaching ability. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trinedad Posted December 21, 2008 Share Posted December 21, 2008 A kids wrestling ability might be greater than a parents coaching ability. That happend with me a long time ago. I dont coach as much as provide feed back on what I am seeing out there as far as how he looks, the positions he gets in and I ask him to explain why he went this way or that way, as much for my own info as for making him thnk about what he did and why. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wrestlinggods Posted December 22, 2008 Share Posted December 22, 2008 A great father coaching son situation that I have witnessed is Coach Atwood from Delphi and his son Braden or what I call him ?Chump?. I was in the corner with Coach Atwood at Fargo and those two were on the same page when it came to wrestling. I am very impressed with their relationship on and off the mat. A definite positive example to look at if you are a coach with a son that wrestles. Coach Weimer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
my 3 wrestlers Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 I am the MOM of 3 wrestlers and my husband has coached them since they were very young. I know that my husband loves to coach our boys. He knows when to coach and when to parent. He celebrates with them when it's time to celebrate and cries with them when they are hurting. He does expect them to work harder than anyone else on the team and they always have done that. He also knows that all 3 boys are different and their wrestling is also very different. He coaches (and parents) according to each son's abilities. I do know that my boys have always wanted their dad to be on the corner of the mat when they are wrestling. Good Luck to all the coaching dad's out there. It's not an easy job, but it's worth the 6 minutes (more or less). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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